today, my brother is leaving to seek for greener pastures in the land of Arabs. his income has been dormant for many years now. he and his family of nine (including his wife) has been living with my mother for maybe seven years now. all the household expenses has been shouldered by my mother though my brother is the one who continued the farming that our father left. i don't know what is it that he lacks that everything he puts their (his wife) hands on ends up in misfortune. they started a grocery store in the public market but suffered bankruptcy; tried their luck in piggery for a long time but no success; i remember them doing meat dealership but no gain either; the farming is not as good as it was when my father used to handle it -- to make it short they tried their best to earn but did not succeed. i know my brother is a hard-worker, he is a good father, i think he is a good husband, a good son, a caring brother and i'm pretty sure he is a very loving person. i don't know, i just feel sad that inspite of all the good qualities that he has, he was never able to provide enough for his family. maybe it has to do something with his gambling, nobody really wins in gambling i'm sure of that. my other siblings and i have always been there to help him but it's not the type of help that we should provide what they need for them. i remember kuya ringo told me weeks before he died that we should help him find the resources and not to be the resources for him. everybody in the family has had a share of the resources that they received especially my mother, who gave the most. the rest of our family got tired of that routine but i'm very proud to say that nobody back stabbed my kuya cris, walang sumbatan and i feel good about that.
today, i am very happy, worried, excited.. actually it's mixed emotions, a fruit salad of emotions, hehe. i am happy that he has made it at last!!! i'm a little worried that he'll be away like me but the difference is that he is a family man, he's got children who are all so close to him back home... but i hope he will not be defeated by homesickness. i'm excited for his success as a family man!!! and a fruit salad for him when he comes back home... goodluck kuya, mag-iingat ka lagi. we believe in you, kaya mo yan!!! god bless you